Chapter 19
Dom was gone all the next day, as were Leon and Vince, leaving Letty and I to our own devices.
The device of the day, it seemed, was room service kitty cocktails with vodka, and by quarter after one in the afternoon, both of us were completely shitfaced.
We got our suits on and staggered to the pool area, stripped down, and climbed into the sauna, laughing like hyenas until both of us started blacking out from the combination of heat and booze. Drenched in sweat, we jumped into the cool relief of the pool, and I felt like I would vomit, clinging to the gutter with my stomach lurching and my face over the drain.
"Y'all right?" Letty asked, and I laughed, puking up in my throat and swallowing it back down.
"I think I'm gonna pass out."
"Well, let's get you upstairs so you can do it in the safety of your own bed." I yawned loudly, and she cracked up. "God damn, you're a cheap date."
I woke up feeling like my skull was split in half and my guts were full of seaweed. I wore nothing but my suit, but someone had thrown a blanket over me. I opened my eyes and rubbed at the crust in my lashes. Blinked over at the other bed and Dom was on top of a still-drunk and still-drinking Letty, who was grinning up at him with a beer in one hand and his butt in the other, and Dom was smiling into her throat.
They looked over at me as I sat up, and I made a line for the bathroom, falling to my knees and hurling into the toilet. I didn't want to go back into THAT ROOM, where they were fucking, where Dom was fucking her and just the night before...I puked again, then sat huddled on the tile, my hair horrible from the chlorine, in my ugly black grandma swimming suit, hugging my knees to my chest.
I closed my eyes and rested my head on my knees and dozed off again, waking up in bed.
“We’re all going out,” Letty said, and I must have slept longer and harder than I thought, because Letty was dressed with murderous intent and semi-sober.
"How'd I get back in bed?" I croaked. My god, I was exhausted.
"Dom," she said. "Come on. Get up. We're gonna go out. Without the Torlones. Get dressed."
"Out where?" I sat up slowly. The headache was a little better.
"Dancing," she said.
The club was called Elias, and it was packed. The music was American. Rap, probably. Thumping hard in my chest the minute we walked in. Dominic was so gorgeous, in baggy jeans and a white ribbed tank top, white Adidas Superstars and a white Nike beanie. His wallet chain glinted, along with the silver rope around his neck, the bling at his knuckles, and the hoop in his ear.
Leon was in all black, not bad himself, his curls just peeking out from beneath a black skullcap, wearing a black wifebeater and black cargos, black leather Lugz. He was in a good mood...All of us were. Leon took my hand and squeezed it and kissed my cheek, and I smiled, the headache all but gone.
Most of the people dancing were Mexican, but there were some gringos thrown in here and there. Some were dressed glitzy and flashy, some were dressed like myself and Letty, some like rhinestone cowboys. There was an absolutely enormous disco ball hanging over the center of the dance floor, which was black and white tiling, and a strobe light was making everyone's movements seem jolted and irregular, and tube blacklights ran over all the booths, making our teeth green and our shirts purple, and Dom smirked at Leon, who was looking longingly at the booths and tables.
"Don't even think about it," Dom said. "You will dance tonight. Your girl is a dancer, you know? Studied with Ballanchine's in New York." I gaped at Dom. "She was in the Nutcracker."
"Isn't he creepy?" Letty asked, laughing huskily. "He's spooky. It's that damn laptop of his. He can get anything on anyone."
"Yeah," Dom said, and was suddenly sober. "Had a good teacher." He looked around at all of us and forced a grin. "Gonna let me dance with your girl, Leon?" he asked, and Leon cracked up.
"She still gonna be a virgin when you're done with her?"
Dom grinned.
“Doubtful.”
I burst out laughing, and Letty punched him, but she was smiling.
"Of course you can," Leon said, being serious now. "But it's up to her."
"Wanna go, Izzie? We'll let Letty give Leon some more lessons."
"Good luck, Iz." Letty squeezed my shoulder as I walked by. I stuck my tongue out at her, but I was reeling inside, going mad, immediately. He pulled me out onto the floor and the people parted before him like the Red Sea. Took us right to the center of everything and turned and smiled lasciviously down on me.
"You know how to shake your ass, Isabel?"
I blushed, but didn't break his gaze, nodding, and he leaned in close to me, those black eyes searing my flesh as they swept the length of my body. "Good. Because I can touch you however I want here, and it's only dancing." A blind shiver shot through me, and I nodded again, and he took my hands in his and put them on his hips. "I want you to tell me if you need me to stop."
What I remember about the ensuing ten minutes of my life is a collage in pieces, sensations, thoughts, smells, sounds. I was hyperventilating. The world was a rush of battering bass and screaming color. My head was light and I was more aroused than I'd ever been in my short, sad life.
I was someone else entirely, despite how I was feeling, cool and calm as he ran his hands over my body, as we moved together, as he spun me, grabbed my hips and tugged me back, pulled my ass into his lap. I remember his smile on my throat, the rough denim of his jeans against the bare backs of my thighs, the tripping trail of his fingertips up my stomach, his hand at the center of my back, bending me over, the sheen of salty sweat on him as he pulled me to him and pulled one of my thighs up onto his waist, giant shoulders bulging and glimmering under the strobe, and I remember the senseless, weightless confusion as he dipped me, the delicious pull of neglected muscles as my back arched, way back, so I felt my hair brush my calves. I put my hands on his pecs and locked my eyes on him and made my way down, until my face was just inches from his crotch, licked my lips and grinned up at him through thickly mascara-ed lashes, and stood up rapidly, fluidly, and some spectators laughed as he let his head drop back and moaned. I remember giant hands dropping down from my waist, gripping my ass through the suede of my mini and slamming my hips against his, and he was hard.
When the song stopped, he bumped my chin up with one of his knuckles, and his barrel chest was rising and falling with every breath.
"You're crazy, Isabel. You know that?"
I couldn't say anything. I felt like I was going to cry. We had to go sit down now, with them, pretend there was nothing...I wanted him to take me in those enormous arms and hold me. But he didn't. He couldn't. And I couldn't ask him to. He turned his back on me and walked away, disappeared into the throbbing mess of people.
I went to the dingy little restroom and sat on the toilet, hugging myself and trying to keep from crying. I felt shaky and overwhelmed. Felt "old Izzie" flood back to me. I couldn't help it. I had to cry. And it started out as just a hot wetness in my cheeks, but soon I was gasping out pitiful sobs.
The bathroom door swung open, and I watched the chunky black boots approach my stall, and then they disappeared. What the fuck...?
My heart leapt and hammered in my chest as the person flew at my door and a huge clang rattled the poor thing on its hinges. I looked up to see Letty holding a pull-up on my stall, her chin hooked over the edge, grinning down at me.
"'Smatter, baby?" she asked, and I dropped my head in my hands, unable to meet her gaze, then slipped to the floor, turned around, and threw up. She dropped to her feet again and kicked the door.
"Open up, Mizz Izz," she said. Weakly, I undid the latch. "You shouldn't be bootyshakin' when you're hungover."
I couldn't help but laugh.
"I feel like I'm gonna die."
"Come on back and sit down . Sit STILL. You'll feel better." I stood and she threw one arm around me, looking at me searchingly.
"You okay?"
"Yeah. I'll live." As long as I get to fuck your fiance in the near future...
"You dance all right, you know that?" She awarded me with a rare, warm smile.
"Thanks, Let."
The following day I woke and rolled over in the bed, and Leon was smiling
at me.
“Hey, baby,” he said, and I yawned, smiling.
“Hey yourself.” I glanced over my shoulder and saw Dom sitting at the end of his bed, in a short-sleeved pale blue dress shirt that had kind of a sheen to it, cotton with some stretch woven in, white Dickies, heavy brown leather sandals.
“Wanna go with him?” Leon asked. “He’s got some work to do and I don’t want him going alone, and certain people-“ Letty flipped him the bird “certain people refuse to get their asses out of bed.”
“Certain people don’t know how to behave in public,” Dom said, and she kicked him with both feet in the ass.
I laughed.
“Where’s he going?”
“Look at real estate so we have some ideas to present to the Torlones,” Leon said. “We figured you’ve got a big ol’ brain, you’d be better off going than Letty and I anyway.” I moaned, sitting up slowly.
“You really want me to go?”
“Get dressed,” Dom gruffed, and Leon looked at him.
“Dom wants you to go,” Leon said, not taking his gaze off of Dominic’s face. There was something there I hadn’t seen before, something hard and unhappy and suspicious. What had happened while I’d been sleeping? What had changed. “Letty.” Leon was almost pleading now. “Letty, get your ass up and go with your man.”
“I don’t know jack shit about reality,” she grunted into her pillow, and I couldn’t help but smile, nervously.
“Go,” Leon muttered, planting a soft kiss on the small of my back, still not dropping his eyes from Dom. “Go ahead.”
“You sure?”
“Get dressed,” Dom demanded again. “Let’s go.”
I turned around, closed my eyes, and kissed Leon, long and strong and without stopping for breath.
It’s okay. I love you. Calm down. The message seemed to come across loud and clear, because he dropped back into the pillow and let his eyes fall shut. I drummed my fingers on his bare chest and he smiled softly.
“When will you be back?” he asked, and Dom shrugged as I got up and headed into the bathroom to transform.
“Dinner.” I heard Dom go to the dresser and slide back one of the drawers.
“Jesus Christ. What are you doing with that?”
“Calm down, Leon. It’s in case of emergencies.”
“I don’t know what the fuck you’re doing. And that’s a normal thing. I just hope like hell YOU know what you’re doing for a change.”
“Watch yourself,” Dom said. “Izzie, move your ass.” And he left the hotel room, slamming the door.
“You do not have to go anywhere with him,” Leon called to me in the bathroom, and I sighed shakily. I had missed something. I was lost. Again. I finished dressing, and when I opened the bathroom door, standing barefoot with curly hair tamed in a long braid down my back, I slammed directly into Leon’s chest. “I mean it. If you don’t want to go…”
“It’s all right.”
“Like hell it is. He’s being a prick.”
“It’ll be all right,” I repeated, stepping into some simple brown sandals of my own and smoothing the front of the blue sundress.
As I swung open the passenger side door of the Escalade, Dom greeted me with what I guess was supposed to serve as an apology; a hesitant sort of half-smile, peering at me over black shades.
“This is gonna be boring as fuck,” he said, as I settled and strapped in. “But I need someone with taste to keep me on my toes.”
“What’s the gun for?”
“What do you think?” He leveled me with an eyeless glare and I silenced, shrinking up against the door and closing my eyes. My back ached and all my muscles were stiff. I thought it was probably from dancing, but it was right around that time, too…I was just about due to get my period, and was glad I had come prepared. There were so many things I was unclear on, so many things I wanted to ask Dominic, but I couldn’t bring myself to open my mouth about any of it. What the fuck was that last night, buddy? Huh? And what are we looking at real estate for? Real estate for what? An auto garage? I think not…And how dare you be so fucking gorgeous?
I closed my eyes, more than a little confused, and a bit pissed, on top of that. He treated me like shit. Treated all of us like shit…We belonged to him. We were all his property, and he treated us as such. I could still feel him, his hands on me, his breath on my face, and it made me insane, made my skin burn and my face flush and my hands shake. I could smell him, sitting there, and it was infuriating. I wanted him so bad I could taste it, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it. Leon was perfect. Dom was an asshole. And I was an idiot.
“Izzie, listen,” he said, completely out of the blue. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry about this whole fucked up thing.”
I looked at him, scanning his face carefully. He wasn’t bullshitting me. He looked stressed and unhappy.
“I’m sorry too.”
“Are you? What the hell for?”
“For being….For…” I blushed and had to turn my face away, muttering, “I don’t fucking know. For liking you.”
“You’re sorry for liking me?” He snorted. “That’s fucking ridiculous.”
“I’m sorry.”
“What for now?”
“For being fucking ridiculous,” I said, and he pulled over, putting one arm over the back of my seat and swiping his glasses off his deep brown eyes with the other hand.
“You can’t help who you’re attracted to, Izzie. It’s physical. It’s a fucking chemical reaction in your body that you have nothing to do with. Only thing you can help is what you do about it. And we are not doing anything wrong. So quit beating yourself up and just have fun while you’re here, you know?” He was serious but not nasty, and smiled when he finished speaking. “Allright?”
What could I say to that? I could only nod. I couldn’t stop the tears from flooding to my eyes, and I swallowed down this thick lump. I felt weak and shaky, like my whole life was out of control, whirling away from me, and I had no idea how to stop it, to control it. Dom’s diplomatic kindness had taken me completely aback, and I shook my head slowly, turning my face away from him.
“You’re tired. You’re hungover. And you’re only 18 years old. You just need some decent food and some rest.” He tousled my hair with one big paw and smiled. “Let’s stop somewhere.”
He pulled into the tiny, ten-car parking lot of a dingy little restaurant with tables outside and in, and we sat together in a booth. He was right; I was starving and I was exhausted. I ordered some tacos and Mountain Dew and was nodding off as we waited for our food. He was quiet. He was humbled. By my guilt, perhaps? By my tears? By the fact that he had become physically aroused dancing with me the night before? A combination of the aforementioned?
I remembered, out of nowhere, the time he had come by my place looking for Brian after he’d knocked the shit out of him. Remembered our little conversation in the kitchen, about when I was ready, I wouldn’t be afraid, and about Leon not pushing me to have sex with him. He had been this way then. Paternal, almost. Warm, friendly, human. It seemed to me that every time I was alone with him, he was another man entirely, and it puzzled me. Who was he holding up the hardassed façade for? Who did he know that he had to protect himself against? No one? Everyone?
I felt strange and got up to go to the bathroom. Fucking perfect. I had my period. I was grateful it hadn’t leaked all over, that I wouldn’t have to suffer that humiliation on top of the embarrassment of crying in front of him, of being so completely transparent. I put a cork in it and looked in the mirror as I washed my hands, my eyes locked on the eyes in the reflection. I didn’t recognize myself. They were my old clothes, that was my old face, but the eyes…I was becoming someone else. Something else. I wasn’t sure how I felt about the girl in the mirror, the confusion I saw there. This was a vacation, right? I was supposed to be having fun.
Dom had been right; I felt twenty times better after having something to eat, something of substance in my stomach. We left the restaurant, stepped into the blazing blue and gold of the early afternoon.
“You drivin, Mizz Iz?” he asked, and I grinned.
“Why not.”
We circled the giant city looking at property. I had been under the impression that we were looking for a site to build the auto garage they’d been talking about, but instead we were looking at abandoned storefronts, for rent and for sale.
“We’re going to have a little restaurant, too,” was the only explanation he would give me, and even this was said uneasily. I didn’t push the envelope.
It seemed that every place in the city was totally and completely filthy and disgusting, and that was the reason they were for sale. Dominic was unsure of himself, looking over the buildings, walking, checking the walls, and he was gauging my reaction constantly, asking my opinion. He doubted himself. More than Leon, more than Letty, more than any of them, he really wanted to be cultured and respectable, and didn’t know where to start. I wanted to tell him there were better entryways to the upper class than through the Italian mob, but it was not my place and probably never would be.
All I could do was offer my advice, highlight the pros and cons of each place, feel out the character of the establishment and let him know what might be done to improve it. He seemed to appreciate it, to hang on every word. Like just because I was rich I was much more suited for the job of choosing a site than he ever would be.
The sun was setting, flame orange over the skyline, and we had just one more we wanted to take a look at. He was driving, the sunset reflected in the lenses of his shades, and he licked his lips and took a deep breath, as if he were steeling himself to say something difficult.
“Look, Izzie.” I looked. “I’m really sorry about the way I was to you in the room this morning, telling you to move your ass, and trying to keep you out of this trip. But I think…I think you know why I did it. Don’t you?”
“Yes,” I said slowly. “And I think I know why you have to be a dick to me in front of Letty, too.” He nodded.
“Haven’t been perfect in the past, and now every minor offense sets her off…She’s friends with you though. She told me she doesn’t think you would do anything with her because you two get along so well and you’re decent.” I winced. “I know. Hurts, doesn’t it. To be trusted when you know you don’t deserve it.” I swallowed hard and turned my face to the window.
“I won’t…I don’t want to hurt her. But she knows, doesn’t she.”
“Of course she knows. She’s not stupid. She’s smarter than I am.” He chuckled a little. “She knows you’ve got something for me.” He paused for a moment, scanning the side of me, and I met his gaze, and it was as if he wasn’t sure if he should continue. “And she knows I’ve had my eye on you, too.” I gasped a little and held the breath I’d drawn. Part of me wanted to sing and dance, exulted, flattered, triumphant, and part of me was full of a sinking dread. No, God dammit, Dominic! No! This makes it soooo much harder… I wanted to jump out of the Escalade and run. I wanted to jump in his lap and fuck. I wanted to scream and cry, laugh and thank the Lord, give him a knuckle sandwich and a kick to the groin and a blowjob all at once. I had never been so confused in all my life. So I just nodded and kept my untrustworthy mouth shut and hoped he wouldn’t say anything more.
No such luck.
“Can I tell you something, Izzie?” I slouched in my seat, arms folded over my chest, and looked up at him. “When I see you with Leon sometimes, I feel so pissed. Like I want you to be mine. I don’t just want to fuck you, which is confusing to me. That’s all it’s ever been with the other girls I’ve…Well, that’s all it’s ever been before with everyone except Letty.” I could feel the color draining from my face, and he was losing his chutzpah because of it. “I don’t just want to fuck you, or I would have done it already. I am incredibly drawn to you, and I have no idea why.” And he turned back to the road.
We rolled up to the curb in front of our last try at a place for Dom’s little restaurant, and he smiled warmly at it.
“Izzie,” he said softly, and I nodded.
“That’s the one.”
“Let’s go take a look through the windows.” We got out and looked in, at the hardwood flooring and high ceilings and big, arching windows. It was a beautiful place, with a buffet and a little bakery counter, and even in the waning late-day sun, it was completely illuminated without the use of artificial light. It was large, but not so large it wouldn’t be homey and personal, and there were broad, bare walls with great potential for classy interior design.
“Yes, Dom,” I said. “Yes.”
Leon and Letty were gone when we reached the hotel room, a note on the vanity
that read, “Gone to dinner with V. Back 10:00. Want to go out?”
Dom chuckled a little as he read it.
“They’re insatiable,” he muttered, and I grinned. I loved the fact that he was so intelligent, was so pleasantly surprised that his vocabulary was beyond troglodite proficiency. Muscles, soul, and brain…I was so sunk.
“What’s the deal with Vince, anyway?” I asked, flopping down across the bed on my back and yawning.
“He’s been keeping his distance lately,” Dom said, following my suit on his own bed. “He’s pissed at me and it runs deep. But we’ll sort it, in time.” He yawned as well, adding a growl to it and folding his hands on his belly. He closed his eyes and was silent. I closed mine, and I don’t even remember falling asleep. I just passed out.
When I woke, it was to Leon climbing into the bed beside me, wrapping one
arm around me and pulling me in close to him.
“Hey,” he said softly, and I smiled.
“Hey yourself.” I responded to his kiss hungrily; he tasted wonderful, like brandy old fashioned. His hands were all over; he was sauced. It was obvious that they had gone straight from dinner to “out” and had forgotten their written invite to myself and Dom. He was getting the same kind of drunken grope that I was, and he flashed me a quick smile before centering his attention on the wicked Puerto Rican bitch goddess who was trying to rape him through his clothes.
Leon caught my smile at Dom and paused a moment, a bit confused, as if he were struggling, through his inebriated haze, to decide whether or not he wanted to make an issue of it. He initially decided against it, going for the hemline of my dress and hitching it up around my waist. Dom’s words echoed suddenly in my head. Sometimes when I see you with Leon, I get so pissed…
The fun went out of me, then, remembering that, and I did my best to give back as good as I got, but my heart wasn’t in it. He started getting a little bit forward, taking my bare breasts in his hands and running his thumbs over my nipples, and my body answered to it, but my mind said stop. He dragged his hands down over my ribs, past my waist, and slipped his fingertips into the waistline of my panties. He started to go further, but I remembered that I had my period and my hands shot down to catch his.
“Don’t,” I whispered, as softly as possible, and he stopped, right then, good as usual about it.
“Why?” he whispered back.
Fuck, I swore inwardly. I didn’t want Dom to know I had my period, to realize he’d been driving around with me bleeding like that, and I didn’t really want to tell Leon, either. I was young, I was still embarrassed by that kind of thing, and I hesitated, didn’t want to tell him.
“Why?” he repeated. “What’s wrong.”
“Just…”
“What are you not telling me, Izzie?” he asked, voice loud because he was truly intoxicated.
“Shhh,” I said shortly, my face on fire, and he sat up, looking down at me. I raised up on my elbows, not able to meet his gaze.
“No, tell me. What’s up?” I could tell he was remembering the clandestine little smile he’d caught.
“Leon…” For the eighteenth time in a week I felt like I would cry. I raised moist eyes up to him, completely mortified, knowing I would have to tell him, and now Dom and Letty, although still making out, were listening, I was sure of it. I looked over to see if they were watching, and Leon snapped.
He leapt from the bed we shared like a flying banshee, across the space between beds and onto the sweaty tangle of limbs that was Dom and Letty. They were forced apart and Letty bounced off, landing on her ass, half-naked and fully drunk on the floor beside the bed. She sat, stunned, as I did, as Leon straddled Dom’s stomach and grabbed a fistful of his wifebeater, punching him point-blank in the face. He got another hard hit in to Dom’s jaw before he was thrown down to the bed like an inflatable date and pounced on, Dom holding him by the throat.
“Leon, STOP. You’re drunk as fuck. You don’t know what you’re doing.” Leon plugged a punch to Dom’s iron belly. “Stop!” Dom repeated, grasping his gut with one hand and leaving the other to pin Leon down.
“You fucked her,” Leon slurred.
“I did NOT fuck her.”
“You fucked her.”
Dom wound up and backhanded him across the mouth, and Leon took advantage of the situation, shoving Dom back toward the edge of the bed, but Dom caught hold of him, and when he fell, he brought Leon with him. Letty burst out laughing.
“Hey,” I said, as they crashed to the floor, scrambling and both hitting and tearing and swearing at each other. “Hey!” I repeated, a bit louder. Dom pulled Leon’s head back with a fistful of sandy brown curls and had every intention of smashing his fist directly into Leon’s face. I had a sudden flashback: the image of Brian after a drunken Dom had finished with him. “HEY!” Screamed it this time, and Dom froze mid-swing, Leon froze mid-wince, and Letty stopped laughing. They all turned to me. My heart was pounding, I felt like I would be sick.
“Dom, let him go. Letty, it’s not funny. And Leon…I’ve got my fucking period, okay? I don’t want your hands in my pants because I’m on the fucking rag. Now do us all a favor. Get your drunk ass over here and go to sleep.”
Chapter 20
“He hates me,” I said, meaning Leon, leaning back into the headrest
in the passenger seat of the SUV and putting my feet up on the dash.
“Fuck that, he don’t hate you.” She studied my face for a moment. “You’re not fucking Dom. Are you.” It wasn’t a question.
“No,” I stated, straightforward. “God, no.”
“I know. Because I’ve been with you every day and you’da been limping if you did.” She laughed, and I smiled a little, looking out at Dom, who stood smoking and shooting the shit with Leon and Vince. They were all still dressed respectably, since we’d just come from dinner with the Torlones.
“That bad, huh?”
“Oh, God.” Letty grinned and shook her head. “I was one miserable bitch the next day. Dom’s a big boy. He was so gentle, took his time and did everything right, and it STILL hurt like a sonofabitch.”
“Were you scared?”
“To fuck Dom?” she asked. I nodded. “Hell no. That was something I wanted to do since I was eleven years old. So when he got out of jail, came to my party…It was my sixteenth birthday.” She was smiling broadly, full of mischief. “And he looked at me, probably for the ten millionth time in his life, and for the first time he didn’t see an annoying little ghetto rat.” She laughed, and I did too. “We didn’t get drunk or anything, we just sat and talked and then I went up to get a sweatshirt and he came in with me and…A muthafuckin dream come true, let me tell you.” She was quiet, smoking and reminiscing, until the mechanical bleet of her cell phone woke both of us. She picked up.
“Hey.” I watched her face light up. “I can’t fuckin believe it. You seriously are?” She was silent, letting the other person talk. “Oh, sure. You’re right close. Turn left right now and I’ll see you.” She was quiet again, climbing out of the Escalade and yawning and staring up the street. I did the same, coming to stand next her. A long, plaintive screech of expensive racing tires sounded down the street, and Dom looked up with that same bored deadpan to see a black Dodge Stealth bulleting down the road toward us. With a Blues Brothers-esque finesse, the driver slammed on the breaks just before us, pulled a gifted 180, and stopped the car perfectly alongside the curb in front of the Escalade. The car was jet, inky black, with windows tinted completely black and thin, almost dainty silver flames licking up the hood and along the side panels. The rims were flashy and the license plates said “SMOKEUM”.
The driver’s side door opened and a pair of long legs encased in black leather flares emerged. Dom flicked his cigarette into the street and took a step toward the car, a shiteating grin on his face. When he spoke, his voice was low and rough with ill-concealed intentions.
“Yessss,” he growled, and Letty rolled her giant black eyes. The driver rose to her feet and stood, her shoulders a pale, barely-tanned gold, her hair cut short and a wild, unnatural auburn/burgundy color. She wore a wifebeater that she had gone at with a scissors so it just barely covered her small, bra-less breasts. She was muscley, like Letty, and wore mirror-lensed shades that flashed in the late afternoon sun.
“Jesus Christ, Leticia,” she said. “What the hell are you wearing?” She came to Letty, an expression of genuine concern on her face, then looked wryly at Dom. “I see you’re still draggin’ around the same old ball and chain.” Vince didn’t wait for an invitation, just stormed up to her and picked her up in a tight bear hug. He shook her and kissed her neck and dropped her, and she went to Leon, wrapped her arms around him, and I could see the intricate tattoo across the small of her back, in Olde English letters, reading “VIRI”. Then Dom came to her and she snorted, folding her arms over her chest and staring up at him, letting her gogs slip down the bridge of her nose. “Can I help you?”
“That any way to greet your mentor?” he asked, a filthy smile on his face. He squinted into the sun and looked at Letty. “Hey, Let. How come you didn’t tell me you were inviting the rainbow coalition?”
“Aw, fuck you asshole. Last I remember you were putting my sexual orientation to good use, in your favor, and I didn’t hear a single complaint.” She stalked to Letty and draped one arm over her shoulder, kissing her forehead. “’S’aight, dough. This time we’ll just leave you out of it, if you suddenly so straight-laced. Right, Let?” She cracked up, and I couldn’t help laughing either, as I figured out what they were talking about. This new chick looked at me, appraising me quickly. “Who’s this?”
“This is Izzie,” Leon said, and came and roped one arm around my waist. “She’s my girl.” It was the first he’d touched me all day, and it didn’t feel right, felt forced and devoid of emotion.
"Izzie? ‘Bout fuckin time you get a girl, Leon. I was just startin' to think I'd have to take you to parades with me. Izzie, I'm Viri. Went to high school with Letty." She stepped forward and offered her hand, not releasing Letty, and I shook it.
"Nice to meet you."
"Yeah, we'll see," she said, smiling. "See what you think in an hour or so." She stretched, arms above her head, and I saw that her abs were impressive, well-defined. I had never met a gay girl before. There were two girls at my prep school who had been rumored to have made out in front of a crowd at a Harvard frat party, but it had been drug-induced, they had boyfriends, and weren’t really lesbians, and that was as close as I’d ever gotten. My brain was churning, wondering if it bothered Letty, the way this Viri girl was so possessive of her, so touchy-feely, and wondering exactly how much more they’d done than what they were doing right now. Wondering if the girl had been joking when she’d said she and Letty would go at it alone if Dom was suddenly straight-laced.
“This calls for celebration,” Leon said. “Let’s do it.”
“Now?” Dom asked, looking at his watch. He took Letty by the wrist and tugged her to his side. “It’s six p.m.”
“Yeah, and I’m beat,” Viri yawned. “Been driving for 90 hours.”
“You lie,” Dom laughed. “You got reservations?”
“I thought she could stay in with the Dawg, since he’s anti social and has his own room,” Letty said.
Vince grinned at her.
“Not a problem.”
Leon released me, having completed the marking of his territory, and went again to stand near Dominic. I was achey all over from cramps, and tired from the emotional fiasco of the night before. I had a sort of sick feeling in the pit of my stomach at the way Leon was acting toward me; distant, awkward, quiet. I didn’t want to lose him, and it felt as if he were slowly stepping back away from me, as if I were a wrench in some greater thing that he valued more than our summer fling. He would choose Dom over me, this I knew. In a heartbeat, he would shove me out of his life to save his relationship with Dominic A. Toretto. It frightened me. I felt as if I might have lost him already.
“Let’s go lie down,” she said, to Letty, smirking. “That way we can pull an all-nighter tonight.”
Letty shrugged.
“Sure. Izzie, you too. Girls’ night out tonight.”
“Take pictures of the skyline,” Dom said, nudging Leon. “The city’ll never be the same.”
Letty and I changed out of dinner clothes into comfy street clothes--wifebeaters
and baggy jeans. Viri took the spot usually occupied by Dominic, Letty sleeping
like a rock there beside her, all curled up, and I dozed off in the middle
of a conversation about daytime talk shows with Viri.
The boys shook us awake at sunset, hungry and ornery and bored, and climbed onto the beds with us, Dom on the bed stretching out contentedly between Letty and Viri, Vince and Leon sitting at the end of the bed I was crashed on, smoking cigarettes.
“It’s nine-thirty,” Leon said. “I’m starving. And I could use a drink.”
“I’m not going anywhere looking like this,” Letty moaned, into the pillowcase, and Dom leaned over, almost absentmindedly, and kissed her shoulder. “If we’re going out, I need to get dressed.”
“Me too,” I chimed.
“And me,” Viri agreed.
“Fuck, you guys,” Dom said. “You guys start getting dressed now and we just might get out of here in time for Christmas.”
“Let’s get room service,” Letty suggested, and Dom snorted.
“No.”
“Why not? It’ll be fun. Part of stayin’ in a hotel is-“
“NO.”
“You just gotta say no to her, don’t you.” Viri shook her head. “You don’t even know why you’re sayin no, just so you’re in command.”
“Don’t start.” Dom’s voice was hard and no-nonsense.
“Here,” Viri said, lifting the telephone receiver from it’s cradle. “I’ll order room service. And I’ll be god damned if you’re gonna tell ME what to do.” Letty stuck out her tongue at Dom. “Hello, I’d like to order some room service for number 587.” She looked up at Letty. “What’re we hungry for, baby?”
“Champagne and strawberries.”
“Ooooh, good answer,” Viri chuckled. “Okay. We want three bottles of champagne and strawberries fondue. And we want three large cheese pizzas, breadsticks, and a french silk pie.” She was quiet a moment as her order was repeated back to her, then nodded. “Yeah. That’s it. Bring a bill, I’ll pay in cash when you get here.” She hung up the telephone and flopped back into the pillow, turning to smirk at Dom, and I couldn’t help but smile, despite the fact that I was feeling like shit over Leon’s painfully obvious neglect. He and Dom seemed fine. I’d even caught them laughing together about it. And just the thought of the previous night made me sick to my stomach.
Letty sat up, cross-legged, and lit a cigarette, and Dom rolled over and put his head in her lap. He looked stressed and exhausted, rubbing his eyes like a tired toddler, and Letty sensed it, as well, resting one hand on the top of his head and massaging his scalp with her fingertips. She bent and kissed his forehead, and I smiled softly, but had to look away, aching to show Leon the same kind of tenderness, but he was distant and unreachable. They slipped into a conversation then, the five of them, about cars and races, and I opened myself to it, trying to put pieces together, get to know them.
“You remember when Luis and Hector raced that scrawny little whiteboy from Beverly Hills?” Viri asked Dom, and he looked confused for a moment, then broke out grinning.
“Oh, yeah. That puny richkid in his dad’s McLaren? Killed the engine getting the car to the starting point.” He laughed. “Yeah, I remember. Why?”
“I saw him, last week. Cruisin’. He remembered me, too.”
“Ouch,” Dom grinned. “What was he driving?”
“A Civic.”
Letty cracked up.
“How IS Hector?” Dom asked, and Viri shrugged.
“Don’t see much of him. He’s got a girl now, you know? That changes things.”
“She’s not a racer girl?” Vince asked, over his shoulder.
“Hell no, she’s not. She’s homespun. Sweet. I saw them at Edwin’s Rock the Block.”
“I was wondering if he’d had that again this year,” Dom said. “God damn, those were good parties.”
“Who is it?” Letty asked. “Hector’s girl.”
“Marina something,” Viri shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Marina Montana? Who lives up above the bodega?”
“Yeah, I think so. Why, you know her?”
“Kind of,” Letty said.
“What kind of race scene do they have here ?”
“Formula One,” Leon said. “But we’re not up in that.”
“No, probably not.” Viri yawned and closed her eyes, folding her hands on her bare belly. It was nearly black outside now, and the lights in the room were on dim, giving off just a soft glow. I wondered what it was that made us all so tired, and decided it was probably the heat. I felt as if I could go to sleep again.
“Let’s put some music on,” Viri said, breaking the brief silence. She peeled herself out of the bed and stood and stretched. “This room is excellent. Does it have a hot tub?”
“It’s got a big bathtub that bubbles,” Letty said. “Not really a jacuzzi or anything.” Viri nodded, thumbing through the CD wallet on the dresser top. She chose one and put it on. The softer, upbeat thumb of Jagged Edge streamed through the speakers of the portable little boombox, and she came back and, surprisingly, sat next to me.
“So. Izzie. What’s your story, girl.”
I cleared my throat.
“I’m here with my parents for the summer. I’m just a few houses down from them.”
“Yeah? Where you from?”
“New York, New York.” I smiled.
“You look a little young.”
“She’s legal,” Vince interjected, and we all laughed, myself included.
“I’m eighteen.”
“You bein’ nice to Leon?” Viri asked, and I sat up, hanging my legs off the edge of the bed.
“Occasionally.”
“He’s a sweetheart. You be good to him, you hear?”
“Viri left me for another woman,” Leon grumbled, a wry smile on his face, and Viri snorted.
“You were just too much man for me, darlin’.”
There was a knock on the door.
“It’s open,” Dom boomed, and a dark-skinned man in a gleaming white shirt, black bow, cummerbund et al, pushed a cart over the threshold with a large bukcket of ice and three bottles of champagne, plus a little steel contraption that was steaming and a heaping mound of strawberries.
“Excellent,” Viri said, standing and tugging on the chain at her hip so her wallet slid out of her back pocket. She pulled out a crisp stack of brand-new bills and paid the boy, told him to keep the change. He smiled and ducked shyly out the way he’d come.
The champagne flutes were plain but pretty, understated elegance with fading frosted bases and one tiny rose etched on each one.
“Livin’ large,” Dom grinned, inspecting one, and Letty laughed and slugged him. Viri popped the cork and held the bottle to her mouth, the foam she couldn’t swallow running over her chin and down her front. Vince’s eyes were raptly attentive, locked on her as she poured and distributed.
“We should have a toast,” she said.
“To what?” Dom asked.
“Izzie,” Viri said. “You’re the newbie. You do the toast.”
“Oh Lord. Me?”
Letty cracked up. She put on a comically accurate Jersey accent:
“Come on, Mizz Izz. You know you smawt. Go fo’ it.”
“Gah.” I stood up. “Okay. Short and sweet.” I raised my glass. “TO the company of friends, to health and happiness, to longevity and prosperity, to beers and beaches and badass cars. Oh, and last but not least, to summer vacation in Mexico.”
“Amen.” Dom laughed, and we all gravitated in toward one another and clinked our glasses.
“Hear, hear!” Viri said, and we all drank.
We refilled and rearranged, Leon stretched out across our bed with Vince at the foot of it, and I sat between Letty and Viri, all three of us lined up cross-legged against the wall with Dom sitting against the headboard in front of us. He kept rubbing at his temples and neck, as if he had a migraine. He stopped, though, as he got a little bit drunk. We passed around the bottle until it was gone, then popped the cork on a second one. It was fairly sweet, the champagne, a pale golden color with sparkling cascades of tiny bubbles ever rising from the bottom of the glass to the surface. After my fourth glass, I began to feel quite warm, my skin humming, lips tingling and almost numb. So I had another glass.
Vince and Leon had abandoned the champagne and chocolate strawberries for Absolut screwdrivers and pizza, which had arrived without my noticing, and they were watching a smutty pay-per-view in complete silence. Dom was listening to the rambling conversation between Letty and Viri, but their words came to me as if I were underwater, and I grasped very little of what they were saying. Dom set his glass down on the bedside table and yawned, lying horizontally across the bed on his belly with his face in Letty’s lap again. She sat with her back to the wall, and Dom was longer than the bed was wide, so his feet stuck off the side. She looked down at him, brow furrowed a little, and tugged lightly on one of his little round ears.
“You sick?”
“My head is fuckin’ pounding,” he muttered, into her stomach.
“Damn, big dude,” Viri snapped her fingers. “How we supposed to get butt-nekkid and freaky if you’re all sick an’ shit?”
“Go right ahead,” he said. “Lesbian lovin’ is a spectator sport.” Everyone burst out laughing, Leon and Vince the loudest.
“Yeah, girls,” Vince piped in with a saucy smile. “Get busy.”
The cocky self-assurance on Viri’s face softened, and Letty met her questioning gaze almost shyly. Dom seemed to sense the sudden charge in the atmosphere, because he rolled onto his back and opened his eyes, watching upside-down as Viri made her way to the other side of the bed to put her glass on the floor. She walked on her knees back to where Letty and I sat. She put one leg over Dom and eased her weight down so she was straddling him, this mischievous grin on her face again as she wrapped one hand around the back of Letty’s neck and pulled her gently forward, pressing her lips to Letty’s mouth.
“Hell yeah,” Vince said, clapping Leon on the back. I couldn’t take my eyes off of them, staring with a disbelieving chaos of mixed emotion. Letty’s hands were on Dom’s shoulders, but Viri’s hands were only on Letty, on her waist now, the black satin curtain of Letty’s hair brushing against the alabaster of Viri’s skin and making it glow in comparison. I managed to tear my gaze away and look at Dom, who was keeping his hands to himself, gripping the comforter lightly, but was watching closely.
Leon and Vince rose in unison, wiping greasy hands on their pants and sitting slowly, as not to disturb Letty and Viri, one on each side of Dom, Leon next to me but not touching me. The music from the CD on repeat was simultaneously soft and hard as Viri moved her hands to cover Letty’s breasts. I was shaking, my heart throbbing, and I drained my sixth glass of champagne.
Leon nudged me and smiled this slow, tired smile.
“Get in there, Izzie,” he said, his voice kind of throaty. I raised my eyebrows and couldn’t help but return his smile, nervously, and then I jumped as I felt someone’s hand take mine.
It was Viri. She pulled me, gently, in toward her, and drew back from Letty to meet my eyes. Hers were large and darker gray than mine and very expressive, and my hand trembled out of control in hers. I could feel Letty’s black gaze on my face, and I licked my bottom lip without even realizing it.
“Ever kiss a girl on the mouth before, baby?”
I was buzzing, my heart thrumming and pumping in my chest like a steam engine. I shook my head.
“You want to?”
Her mouth was soft, her hand resting on my forearm, and she was easy with me, chaste, almost. She kept her tongue to herself, was very non-threatening, and I was shaking like a leaf, but wasn’t really afraid. I was frozen, taking what she gave me but too new and too nervous to respond much. I felt a little stiff and uncomfortable, unsure of what I wanted from her kiss, what to expect. I felt my body begin to warm to it and went frigid, trying to keep myself from feeling…awakened…by her. Eyes closed, heart hammering away…What felt like hours was, in reality, thirty seconds at best. Then calmly, diplomatic, almost, she grabbed a fistful of the front of Letty’s tank and one of mine and broke the kiss she’d held with me.
“Here,” she said softly, in her husky-for-a-whitegirl voice. “Kiss Letty.”
Both Letty and I hesitated a moment, both holding the same thought, I think. Would this be weird if and when we were sober again? But the concern was fleeting, for both of us, and we were far from sober in that moment as our mouths came together. Her lashes tickled my face and our kiss was much deeper. I felt much more relaxed with her, able to respond, and she fed off my response. My nipples were hard and so were hers, and I realized it was probably very obvious when Dom slipped his hands over his head, beneath the hem of her shirt, and up the plane of her stomach. Viri climbed off of Dominic and watched Letty and I kiss, and I opened my mouth and she dipped her tongue in and it touched mine. Vince whistled through his teeth.
We pulled away at the same time, and she pushed Dom’s hands down out of her clothes, a flush of inebriated arousal on her cheeks. She grinned at me a little and shrugged, then urged Dominic into a sitting position. Viri watched her catlike movement as she unfolded her legs and stood on the bed, hopping off.
“Aww, come on,” Vince whined. “Encore.”
“Done for now, Let?” Viri asked, and Letty shrugged again, tottering tipsily to the box of pizza, cocking her head, eye on the porn, and I had the sudden, irrepressible urge to pee.
I sat on the toilet seat long after I was finished, head in my hands, buzzing and feeling very strange. Very numb and practical all of a sudden. And this voice in my head could not be silenced.
My God, Isabel Adams, What the FUCK was that?